Friday, March 2, 2012

Not Sure

Not sure what to title this post because it is so random.

Today was a rough day in general. Malachi woke up cranky and I woke up tired. Throughout the day Malachi's mood didn't really improve which I know this change is hard on the kids too. It is hard that mommy can't be as mobile with them as I once was. It is hard on me too, I actually hate it. I hate that when I stand up to get more water or go the bathroom that Eli clings to my legs begging me to pick him up. I still do as much cuddling as I can with them on the couch, but I know they would prefer that I were more mobile. Tonight I was in the shower when Malachi went to bed and apparently it broke his little heart that he didn't get to tell me goodnight. So I went into his room after I got out (he was wailing) and read to him and sang to him for awhile. I just feel so bad that they need me and I can't be as involved as I would like.

Then there is the whole doing what is best for baby. I don't want to sound at all like my boys aren't important, but in this moment getting through these next few weeks pregnant IS the most important thing. Today was the first day that I actually thought I may be going into labor and it was really scary. I was having lots of pelvic pressure. Since I had an epidural when I was in labor, I never really felt an urge to push or anything, just this slight pressure type feeling and that is exactly how I felt today. Like any slight move and my water would break and the baby would just fall out (oh, if delivery were THAT easy). Then at dinner tonight I started having contractions and by the time I finished dinner and started timing them they were about 2 minutes apart for probably 40 minutes total. I was already very well hydrated so I just laid on my left side and they started to space out. When I got home I took a very quick shower and the whole time I was having contractions. Fortunately things have calmed down now but I am just praying this little one is not trying to come out too soon.

In other stuff, we made it through month #2 of the year and our focus on our finances. We actually had a pretty good month financially (besides medical bills, man are FFN's expensive!) We got our state refund this month which went straight into savings and we also started the process to refinance our home and lock in a much better interest rate which will definitely help our budget every month! We are on target to reach our savings account goal very soon and even put some extra in for our trip to Disneyland this year. We had decided we would not be making our yearly trip to Disneyland to save the money this year and well we got an opportunity we just could not pass up. My parents have been on a wait list for 2 years to get into The Grand Californian Villa's (which are literally just steps from the park entrance) and their request finally came through! So free accommodations steps away from the park, all 3 kids still getting into the parks for free, only 1 kid requiring an airplane ticket - it really isn't going to be that expensive for the week so we had to jump on it (not that it took us any convincing)!

So this year getting back on track with finances really seems to be going well after a rough first month. We still have areas that we need to improve and tighten up on but I am feeling very optimistic that we will get there soon! Going to feel great to complete baby step #3!!!