If I Would Have Had Things My Way

If things had gone the way I wanted them to:

Peter would not have been laid off from the dream job in the skyscraper.

I would not have worked my "Get Peter through school" job for 5 1/2 years.

One of the other homes we put an offer on would have been accepted.

We would have nicer cars, bigger tv's, more lavish vacations, and fancier date nights.

But if things would have gone my way:

We would have been sucked into "The American Dream". Peter wouldn't be home with his family at 5:30 every night! He would work as a number instead of being treated as a person. I wouldn't have learned that I could persevere and maybe even succeed. We would be in over our heads with a larger mortgage. I would have been forced to continue to work outside the home. I wouldn't have learned that true joy is not in who has the most toys at the end of the day.

If things had gone the way I wanted them to:

I would have had a baby a long time ago.

The FBI would NOT have rejected my fingerprints and we would NOT have had to wait 4 more weeks for the new ones to be processed.

We would have gotten on the waitlist long before we did.

We would have gotten our referral in the 1-4 month time frame given to us by our agency instead of having to wait 2 whole months longer.

We would NOT have had 4 court dates.

But if things had gone my way:

We would not have our Malachi. We would have missed out on being on the wait list on his April 16th Birthday. We would not have gotten the call for a precious 2 week old baby boy allowing us to bring home such a young infant! I would not have learned God's faithfulness the hard way. We would have missed out on the biggest blessing of our lives!

If things would have gone my way:

I would NOT have gotten pregnant while finishing up the adoption process.

I would NOT have had to endure nausea and utter exhaustion while caring for my infant son.

I would have had a girl.

I would NOT have had a preemie.

I would NOT have had my newborn son born sick.

But, if things had gone my way:

We would not have our little Elias. I would have missed out on giving my boys brotherhood. I would have missed out on knowing my inner strength. I never would have had to reach a whole new level of intimacy with God. I never would have known the pleading of a mother's heart. I would have missed out on God's blessings POURED out on us through giving us our second child!

God's plans are always greater and better than my own! So thankful that he didn't let me have it my way!!!

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11