Monday, October 20, 2014

So How Is It REALLY With 4 Kids?

We are now 2 1/2 months into our life with 4 young kids so I can say we "should" be as adjusted as we're going to be!

So how is it going?

For the most part it has gone a lot easier than I expected!  The kids all adjusted way better than I could have ever hoped!  There have been zero signs of jealousy, even from Sabrina who legitimately could deserve to be a little jealous.  They've all shown LB nothing but love!  And for Little Miss, she's been a pretty content baby just like all the others.  We've been so lucky in the sleep department with all of our kids!  She's been sleeping through the night for a long time now and that helps a lot!  Also more recently it seems she's relaxed and accepted us as her family. I know that may seem like a foreign concept, but in the adoption world you know that can take some time, even for a newborn.  She was a bit tense and very easy to startle from the get-go but that has slowly gotten better as we've established ourselves as mom and dad.

So with how easy the kids have accepted her and with how easy she's been, it has been pretty easy to adjust to 4 kids I feel pretty fortunate that things have gone this well.  For us, the adjustment to 3 has been the most difficult of all!  We've been able to stick to our routine pretty easily and it is nice that the other kids are old enough where (for the most part) they are patient and can wait for me to finish up with LB and then meet their needs.

But I'm not going to lie.  It has also been hard.  I've never been more tired than I am now!  Even with another great sleeper, the day to day life is exhausting.  I pretty much don't get a moment to rest until the kids go down at night.  It's hard.  It's hard when I feel like I have a million things on my to do list and I'm exhausted on top of it to not take it out on the kids.  It's hard to never get a break.

A few things we've implemented to help during this chaotic time:

1)  Peter and I communicate constantly.  When he comes home from work, he has a pretty good idea of what I need help with and is always willing to get right into it and help us make it those last few hours.  When frustrations arise we work hard to communicate and resolve whatever the issue is. Communication is so important right now!

2) I take Gaba and Vitamin D pills before bed.  This has helped me a lot with my mood, especially as the weather is changing!

3) We have strict bedtimes.  The three bigger kids are in their beds right around 7 every night.  I NEED them to go to bed so Peter and I can have a few hours to ourselves.  We've also done a pretty good job of getting Lillybelle on a bedtime schedule too and so she goes down pretty quick after the others do.  Peter and I also try very hard to be in bed by 10 too so that we can get enough rest to tackle these exhausting days.

4) Routine Routine Routine.  I have a pretty set routine at home and I think that makes a huge difference in the kids.  They do have activities like church, awana, soccer but our day to day is pretty set in routine and that has proven to really help their attitudes.

5) We've mastered at home date nights.  Real date nights have proven few and far between and the time alone together has proven more valuable than ever in recharging and connecting as a couple. We've gotten pretty good and creative with at home dates.  We take advantage of every free redbox code we can for movies nights (like tonight) and Peter is good at running out to grab us dinner while I get the kids settled in bed. Even though we'd prefer to get to go out together, we're making this work for now and having a good time together!

 As I am able to stand back and watch my kids, I am so thankful. I have every. single. thing. I ever wanted in life and I am so blessed!  But being a mom is hard work and we're in a more difficult season of that right now with these young kids.  I know these moments will pass in a blink of an eye So I am soaking it all in and loving these little babies as much as I possibly can! Life is good!