Adjusting Through Changes

We are going on 2 months since Peter made a job change. We knew this opportunity would come with some huge changes on the the homefront but in the end still felt the new opportunity was worth taking the risk. We spent many hours prior to the move discussing how it would look and how we hoped things would work for us. Mainly, Peter was concerned about all the activities and home responsibilities and how I could handle the added work at home with him home less. I've been super spoiled in the past with him having pretty flexible work schedules and his willingness to always jump in and help as soon as he walked in the door. We had a lot of concerns about how things would look, but I am happy to report that things are going great, the transition has gone smooth! The whole family has adjusted and even though we miss each other (absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?)  I'm really impressed with how we've all adapted. I knew that overall the biggest part of the job change would affect my life and my stress level. Already we have made several changes and adjustments to make this all work as efficiently and stress free as it can for me. I know there will be even more adjustment as we go along but so far these are the things that have worked for us:

Here's some changes we've made:

1) Simplify, simplify, simplify. There are some subcategories within this, but we've really tried to reduce as much of the stress as we can and make things easier. The kids are pulling me in all sorts of directions with homeschool and sports and activities, and I have found myself more than a little overwhelmed this year in trying to get everything done and be everything to everyone. It's hard to admit I'm not superwoman, but I'm not! This new job has afforded us some great new opportunities to reduce some of the stress at home.

We've hired out yard work. Our yard is large enough that we could and have spent weekend after weekend during the summer working on it and still end each summer with a long to do list that we never get all the way through. Now someone does the maintenance portion for us and the yard has never looked better. It has already made a difference in that we can work some on the weekend but then also have plenty of play time as a family too!  With very limited time together during the week, this weekend family time is very important!

We started a subscription to Hello Fresh. This one was more just for fun, but it also has made my life easier. It has actually been a blast for me as it helps with meal planning and gets me out of a cooking rut. I love to cook but I get bored and so this has been a fun way for me to mix things up and simplify meal planning. 

 We are making adjustments to school for next year. LB will be the first child in our family that I am not homeschooling for preschool. She is very excited about going to preschool and I really do think it will be the best fit for her. This will also make things a little bit easier on me as I won't be having to make the transition to teaching 4 kids yet. We have also made the decision to transition the other kids from parent led to online streaming for school. I am waving my white flag and realizing that it's a huge undertaking to try and teach 3 different grades all on my own. We will still be using the same curriculum that we love but it will really simplify the process of teaching for me and give me peace of mind that they are learning everything they need to be learning. 

2) Ask for help. I hate relying on others but this has become important. We're asked quite a bit what our plans are for the future as Peter now commutes 2-3 hours a day. The short answer is we don't know long term but at least for our near future we've decided to stay put and give the commute a chance. The main reason being, we have a great support network where we live now with family and friends. I already worry about the fall when we're going to have 3 kids in soccer and practices and games where I can't be everywhere at once, but I'm trying to live in the moment, because the moment is busy enough.  I still want to do as much as I can on my own but when we're bouncing from gymnastics, baseball, awana, swim, piano, ballet, appointments etc on a weekly basis it gets tough to do it all without some help. Peter's old job offered him some flexibility so he was able to help out with some of these things but now it really is all on me, but staying where we are has left me with a support network who seems eager to help out when I need them, which in turn helps me keep some sanity!  

2) Prioritize Quality Time. We knew when this job change was taken on that we were going to have to keep the lines of communication open. I was going through some stuff when this job started and that was probably the toughest part of the whole transition, but we really did keep communicating and working together. Peter has been great with understanding that changes need to happen to help make things easier on me and he's willing to be flexible with whatever I need. I know he'd like to be more involved with things at home but he's had to put a lot of trust in me to keep things moving and happening, and I've had to communicate what I need from him in the few hours I have him home everyday. We also have to balance what we need as spouses with what the kids need, they love their Dad and miss him because they often only get a very short amount of time with him each evening, so as much as I want time with my husband, I also have to share him. We spend even less time than we used to watching tv because we want to catch up and chat. We are trying to prioritize date nights as a couple more often and date nights with the kids more often to foster quality time.  The schedule is plenty busy but we are making the weekends as fun as we can.

It seems strange because life is busy and this transition did change life quite a bit, but for some reason life feels less stressful and the home feels happier. Maybe because Peter seems pretty happy at the new job, maybe because the extra income has allowed us to simplify life in other areas, or maybe it's just spring in the air bringing out the best in us.  Either way, we're loving life as we head into the summer and always open to adjusting the plan as we go along!